How To Raise Your Child As A Single Mother
By Amanda Jerelyn
Parenting is a tough job, and when you are a single mother doing it all alone, it gets more challenging. Earlier single parenting was no less than taboo, but today people are more mindful of what they pick out. Recognition, awareness, and perception have made women more autonomous today, and now she can finally seek out options that are beneficial for her and her children.
There can be many reasons a mother alone is raising her child, and there's no father to share the job. It could be an abusive marriage, mutual choice or passing away of the father. But, irrespective of the reason, what keep's going is exceptional defies.
Even the strongest mothers get weak here. If you are one dealing with this trauma and battle, remember you're going to make it. It will take efforts, but don't lose your vigor. Take support, talk to your mentor and jot down points that can help you raise a contented child.
Tips To Raise A Happy Child Being A Single Mother
Here are some expert tips that will ensure your new chapter towards parenthood goes smooth and is chaos-free.
1. Don't Feel Guilty
When you're on the route of raising a child alone, the first thing is to de-clutter your mind. Wipe off all the stress you've to endure and don't feel accountable.
Accept all that happened and move on. Start your journey with a guiltless mind and become clearer of your path. Remember your child needs you, and in this tough time, your presence means all to them. You will have responsibilities, everyday jobs and household chores. If you continue being guilt-ridden, you will never come out of that position, and not only you but your child will suffer the most.
2. Overdose Your Child With Love, Attention And Appreciation
Children of a single parent often need attention. Since they lack the care of another parent, you will have to play both a mother and father.
Many single mothers choose the wrong path and feel guilty for not providing their kids with the lavish life their father could offer, but certainly, they are wrong. Your child does not need a luxurious life; they need your time, care, affection, love and appreciation.
Accept all that happened and move on. Start your journey with a guiltless mind and become clearer of your path. Remember your child needs you, and in this tough time, your presence means all to them. You will have responsibilities, everyday jobs and household chores. If you continue being guilt-ridden, you will never come out of that position, and not only you but your child will suffer the most.
3. Overdose Your Child With Love, Attention And Appreciation
Children of a single parent often need attention. Since they lack the care of another parent, you will have to play both a mother and father.
Many single mothers choose the wrong path and feel guilty for not providing their kids with the lavish life their father could offer, but certainly, they are wrong. Your child does not need a luxurious life; they need your time, care, affection, love and appreciation.
However, it's suggested not to expect a yes from them. If you can make your concern clear, and still it's a no, then give your luck a second try. But don't beg.
Amid the chaos, if you think you will have to join no matter what, then make sure you spy on vacancies of other companies and always plan ahead.
4. Learn To Say No
Learning to say no and setting your limit is the knack everyone should have but is crucial for single mothers. Mug up to say no whether to your child, acquaintance or relatives.
Every time your child asks for a toy is not necessary you get them. If the puppet is out of your budget, you can look for a cheaper one, but if your child only needs that one, then better say no.
Teach your child the value of managing finances. No matter how many tantrums they throw but eventually, they'll learn to prioritize what matters most.
5. Connect With Happy Single Mommies
It's easy to say look after your child, stay calm and love yourself, but only people with familiar experience will know how you suffer and what you go through.
Teach your child the value of managing finances. No matter how many tantrums they throw but eventually, they'll learn to prioritize what matters most.
6. Connect With Happy Single Mommies
It's easy to say look after your child, stay calm and love yourself, but only people with familiar experience will know how you suffer and what you go through.
A single mother in her Master Thesis UK recommends taking short breaks from a hectic routine. She suggests recharging yourself and meditating to rejuvenate your energy.
You can also consider going alone for dinner. Unwind your mind. Love yourself. Catch up with a long lost friend and do whatever it takes to bring your peace back because you matter!
7. Teach Your Child Gratitude
Children from an abandoned family are usually unappreciative and show no gratitude towards their blessings. Therefore, you must tell your child what they need to be thankful for.
Tell your kids how the small holes of life are trivial for us and how no one's life can be perfect. If you lack teaching your child gratitude practicing, they will always remain unhappy and hopeless.
Don't let them feel that they are ill-fated. Instead, count on your blessings in front of them and focus on the positive side of your life because children mimic what their parents do. If you are happy today, your child will be content tomorrow; otherwise, sadness and dejection will become forever for them.
Never Do This Otherwise You Will Mess Up Your Child
Now here are a few practices that you should never execute in front of your children. If you do, it will have an adverse impact on them.
· Staying Pessimistic All Time
A pessimistic attitude is a key to antagonistic behavior. Make sure you are not throwing negative energy all day. Never express hate or anger towards your child. If your child is playing around the lounge and throwing things, it's natural. Remember that, after all, he is a child, and this is his natural behavior. This is you who need to control anger.
Don't irritate on petty issues. Instead, deal with it and tell your child how to overcome such problems. Always stay optimistic and embrace a positive mindset. Instill in your child the knack of problem-solving.
· Speaking Ill About The Father And Paternal Family
Sadly parents don't realize what influence it has when one parent talks mean and harsh about another. You might take out your frustration for a few minutes, but what unfavorable impact it has on your child, you might never know.
Also, never let any of your relatives do the same. This way, your child will become disrespectful towards his relationships and root anger for something he doesn't even know entirely of.
· Ignoring Mistakes
Never turn your back on your child's mistakes. Instead, make them accountable for their wrongdoings. If these mistakes are some blunders or slip-ups, you can ignore for a couple of time. But, if they are misconducts, punishment is necessary. However, you don't have to become harsh or violent with them.
Remember, your motive is not to mistreat but to save your children from missteps. First, give your child groundings of their behavior and activities. Teach them discipline and look if they are repeating it or not; for the first time, you don't have to punish, but if it continues, punishment is necessary.
· Comparing Them To Others
Again a serious glitch that parents often make is comparing their child to another child. This drill is very detrimental to children's mind. They lose their knack for self-confidence and start behaving rudely. If your child is making a mistake, correct them, not compare them.
Remember, your motive is not to mistreat but to save your children from missteps. First, give your child groundings of their behavior and activities. Teach them discipline and look if they are repeating it or not; for the first time, you don't have to punish, but if it continues, punishment is necessary.
The more politely you will deal with them, the faster and better they will accept their mistake; otherwise, they will always behave indecently, making your blood boil.
· Not Keeping Track Of Your Child's Activities
Single mothers need to have a strict eye on their children's activity. So it would be better for you both if you have a trace to where your child is going, whom he is meeting, etc. This practice will make your child know that their mother has an eye on them and won't participate in illegal or illicit activities.
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Author bio
Amanda Jerelyn is currently working as a Blogger at Crowd Writer and Dissertation Assistance. She is also a relationship counselor and has a keen interest in writing blogs and articles to assist single parents and children spend their lives more thoughtfully.