It’s no secret that after you’ve had your first baby, your life changes in pretty major ways:
- Your body is altered,
- your definition of free time is modified, and most significantly,
- that pile of laundry which was previously your largest is never that small again!
With Valentine’s Day right around the corner, it is safe to say that your quality time with your partner is also a little different than it has been in the past. A fancy night out on the town might now look like Uber Eats for takeout and trying to make it through on TV show without falling asleep on the couch together.
I can almost guarantee that another thing that is different than before kids is… Your love life! From one mom to another, I’ll be the first to admit that it’s hard to make time for the sexy stuff, especially if you are tired. And I suspect it is even harder if you have kiddos in your bed with you.
But guess what?! If you start to implement these four tips this week, you would have your bed back by Valentine’s Day!
Tip 1 – Find a plan (or blog or guide or coach) that you feel comfortable with
Raising little one in this age of “valuable information at our fingertips” means you can find just about anything on Google or Pinterest. So take a little time and find a program that feels like a good fit for your family. There are LOTS of options all with varied goals, techniques and timelines. So, research BEFORE you start so that you know what to do when X, Y or Z happens! You’ll be glad to have a plan, especially in the middle of the night!
Tip 2 – Be consistent
Whether you are sleep training on your own, or hiring a consultant to work with, BE SURE THAT YOU ARE CONSISTENT. You owe it to yourself and your kiddo to send one clear message. When we get confused or waiver in our expectations, confusion results and protest increases!
Tip 3 – Partner up
Next, find yourself a buddy to help hold you accountable. Maybe you have a friend or neighbor who has successfully sleep trained, maybe your mom is willing to come over for a few nights to help you, maybe you and your partner can tag team the task, or maybe you need a support coach. No matter who is helping you remember that it is okay to ask for help and “we all need somebody to leeeean on”.
Tip 4 – Celebrate the little wins and the big ones, too!
Remember that change is hard! Breaking old habits is hard. Creating new habits is hard.
Trusting your (tired) gut is hard. And sticking to a plan is hard. So, if you get a nap that’s a little longer than the day before, or a night where your little one is happier to be in their crib than last night, celebrate!
Go forth and conquer, mama! Valentine’s Day is just around the corner!
For exhausted human beings (especially those in charge of tiny ones), it is incredibly difficult to make a plan, follow through on a plan, alter a plan when needed and see success from a plan, but with the tips listed above – YOU CAN DO IT! And with Valentine’s Day just a few days away, what better motivation do you need to get your bed back? Bow chicka wow wow!
Brittney Stefanic is a certified all-age sleep consultant specializing in sleep for mom bosses and their families. She gets that making time for yourself and your partner is TOUGH, especially when sleep is out of the question! If your family is struggling with sleep, this Valentine’s Day might feel REALLY different than past years. As an educator, Brittney believes in the power of teaching and loves supporting families in meeting their sleep goals through her customized sleep plans. You can follow her on Instagram, Pinterest and Facebook @brittneystefanicsleep for access to her free sleep tips and tricks and opportunities for virtual sleep Q&A sessions.
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